This morning, I got up, grumbled about random aches and pains (physical and psychological) and hauled my sorry ass to work.

I got to the office approximately 15 minutes early, so I went directly to the food court to pick up a little bit o’ brekkie. As I got closer to the food counter, I heard the customer in front of me say, “At least it’s Friday.” And I thought to myself, it’s Thursday. Oh…she must be taking tomorrow off, so it’s her Friday.”

After I ordered and paid, the cashier handed me my change and said, “Have a good weekend.” My auto-response mechanism said, “Thanks, you too.” But I was thinking, “They’re closed tomorrow? No…they can’t be.”

I walked to the pick-up counter and waited for my breakfast. When the girl making my sandwich passed it to me, she said, “Thank you, and have a good weekend.” Now, I was thoroughly confused. Is it really Friday? It’s not Friday. Is it?

You know when you’re having one of those really vivid dreaming and you’re absolutely convinced that what’s happening can’t be real, but it feels so real? Yeah…I was having something similar but I was completely awake.

Source: http://euge.ca/2013/06/16/nightmare/

So I took my sandwich and walked to the elevator bank. In the elevator, two women were talking to one another and since I don’t eavesdrop, I don’t know what they were talking about. But one phrase caught my ear… “Well, at least it’s Friday.”

At this point, I couldn’t take it anymore. It can’t be that so many people are thinking that today is Friday if it’s really Thursday.

So I pulled out my phone.

I pressed the power button.

And what did the home screen say?

Source: http://messick.edublogs.org/files/2013/03/keep-calm-its-friday-43-2dnlq4a.png

Yeah…I’m slowly going insane. Please, someone make the voices stop.

Source: http://blogimages.thescore.com/mlb/files/2012/08/happy-friday-hand2.jpg

I know…I’ll just put on some Joshua Bell music and be done with it.

Source: http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-uoyVMDC1A40/UUrfazv5aRI/AAAAAAAAGSQ/YAt2-gZ4bzQ/s1600/funny-friday-quotes-1.jpg

You know, I try to be nice.  I always try to be diplomatic, especially when talking to Leafs fans.  I don't hate the Leafs.  I'm completely indifferent.  I don't care whether they win or lose.  The only teams I hate in the league are the Bruins and the Flyers.  It's not a personal disdain for the cities...I have no issues with the cities.  I just hate the teams.

But Leafs, well...everyone talks about the big Habs-Leafs rivalry...but to be honest, in my lifetime, the Leafs have never performed at a level that made them a significant rival.  I'm not the kind of Habs fan that yammers on about how many cups the Habs have won, but I do point out that in my lifetime, the Habs have won 4 Stanley Cups.  And the Leafs?  Yeah...I didn't think you'd want to talk about that.  The only reason people even still talk about a Habs-Leafs rivalry is because both fanbases are mildly *cough*ridiculously*cough* insane, and they're physically close enough to have large quantities of rival fans in their own barns.

As an ex-pat Montrealer who has spent almost 80% of her life in Toronto, I've become quite the diplomat when talking to the crazies (not all Torontonians are crazy Leafs fans...and not all Leafs fans are crazy, THANK GAWD!).  I've never been into trash talk...in any sport.  I've played competitive sports.  I watch sports.  I don't engage in trash talk, because quite frankly, I don't think that's good sportsmanship.  If *you* like trash talk, that's fine.  Go to town.  I don't care.  Just be respectful and understand that I won't participate.  HOWEVER, if you piss me off, I have no problem decimating your ego with the hand of my rage.  You brought it onto yourself.  Consider yourself warned.

This isn't the first time I've dealt with idiot co-workers.  The last guy, slammed my team *and* hometown.  This guy was just over-the-top arrogant even though there wasn't a good reason to be.

Jerk co-worker (JC):*eyeing my Habs lanyard* Oh, so you're a Habs fan.

Me: I'm from Montreal.

JC: So they're just the default.

Me: No, it means it's in my blood.

JC: Habs overachieved this year.

Me: Well, we didn't have any big ticket superstars, if that's what you mean.

JC: I watched them play at the beginning of the season and said to myself, 'This team isn't even going to win 5 games.'

Me: The lockout messed up most teams. No one was really putting up spectacular hockey at the beginning of this season.

JC: But the Habs were exceptionally bad.

Me: I think that's just your Leafs' fan bias.

JC: You know what your team needs?

Me: *starting to get annoyed* No, but I'm sure you're gonna tell me.

JC: *mocking tone* Your team needs more French players. Your team was better when you had more Frenchies. Because everyone knows that's what makes for better hockey.

Me: I don't subscribe to that philosophy.

JC: But isn't that what you think your team needs? More hometowners?

Me: That's not what I think.

JC: But look at the decisions your team makes. "French French French." It all sounds like "blah blah blah" to me.

Me: *getting really annoyed* I don't make decisions for the Habs. And I have yet to receive the memo that tells me I have a say.

JC: So you agree that French isn't an asset, right?

Me: Well, in life, I guess there are some people who think being unilingual is awesome. But having been trilingual all my life, it'd be pretty hypocritical for me to think only being able to grunt in one language was superior.

JC: *confused* Uhm, right. So you don't think your team overachieved?

Me: I don't care if they over- or under- achieved. They're my team and I love them no matter what. Being on top for a large part of the season is just icing on the cake.

JC: *smug* The only thing that counts is that they didn't get as far as the Leafs in the playoffs.

Me: Uhm, you know both teams were eliminated first round, right? The Leafs didn't get farther.

JC: Yeah, but we got to game 7.

Me: *pissed* And in typical Leafs fashion, they gave it all up to the Bruins in the last 35s after being up 3 points for most of it. And they did it with all their key players uninjured and intact. *That* was a HUGE achievement. I'm pretty sure, even the Habs couldn't be that stellar...at shitting the bed.

JC:   *mouth gaping* *no audible, coherent sound*

Me:   *sweet smile* *cutesy voice*  Have a great day! *walks away*

Asshole.

Sometimes, I'm convinced that my closest friends don't really know me at all.

BFF:  Oh my! She's getting married already?  Good for her!

Source: http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-Y3zi1iJyzW0/UKuRuzdPdoI/AAAAAAAAKXY/sSmBFvUQzk4/s320/
sugar+cookies+royal+icing+custom+save+the+date+engagement+stick+figure+heart+initials.JPG

Me:  Well, yeah.  She'll be 36.  She has to get a move on.

BFF:  LOL!  Whatever...no rush!  But the guy has to be a willing partner too.

Me:  Phht!!!  That guy would've proposed after the 2nd date if he thought there was a chance that she'd say yes.

BFF:  LOL!! I've been hearing that line a lot lately...I guess it didn't take long after that.

Me:  More like people are more desperate as they get older. 

BFF:  Now now.  Be nice.

Me:  Phht!  I'm gonna be a spinster for at least 2 more lives.  I don't have to be nice to *anyone*. 

Source: http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/3/37/
Anne_Fletcher_and_27_Dresses_at_27_Dresses_Premiere_1.jpg

BFF:  No, you're not!  You have to keep your eyes wide open!

Me:  Give me a break.  I'm seriously not interested.  I like coming home to my dog and a quiet, empty house.

BFF:  Ok, what if he looked like Leo[nardo DiCaprio] and live in Monaco?  You could just quit and play with Elfie and shop all day!

Source: http://acculturated.files.wordpress.com/2012/01/leoandtheswan.jpg

Me:  I love Leo, but when it comes to relationships, he's a superficial model-chaser.  I don't want to live in Monaco because, quite frankly, while beautiful, it's boring.  Nothing to do there.  And as for shopping, you know I'm not a huge fan.    But nice try.

BFF:  I didn't say his superficial must haves, but I know there's someone you could tolerate to be with...even common-law. 

Me:  I'm not Charlotte Lucas.  I don't want to live with someone that I have to tolerate.  I'm Elizabeth.  'Only the deepest of love will induce me to matrimony.'
Reference: Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen

BFF:  Obviously...you need love.  Without that, you couldn't tolerate anybody even with just good looks.  And even with the deepest of love comes tolerance and patience.  Never a win win situation. 

Source: http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-rim0_8iSZDQ/UGcO0q0B7kI/AAAAAAAACXg/
ln_B6TJwM3Q/s1600/all-you-need-is-love-and-dog.jpg

Me:  Well, looks or not, there's no one I love enough to marry, so I don't have to burden myself with tolerating someone.  I'd say I've got a win-win right now.

Honestly, I love her...and I know she means well, but I'd be more than happy if married people would just back off.  Not everyone has to get married.

I have enough earning potential to live comfortably and still save for retirement.  I do what I want, when I want, without having to explain, negotiate or justify my choices.  And I'm indifferent on the subject of having children.  So really, the "issue" of being a spinster is a non-issue. 

And while we're on the roll of being honest, let me just lay down the heart of it all.

I'm not saying that I would slam the door in Mr. Perfect's face if he deicded to make an appearance.  I'm just not searching under every rock and behind every tree to hunt him down.  While I wouldn't mind having a significant other, I don't need one.  And the cold, hard truth of the matter is that I could probably get along better through life without one.  So to be induced into entering into a relationship, I'd have be really impressed with him...because basically, I'd be sacrificing a lot to be with him.

Source: http://www.amazon.com/Mr-Perfect-Men-Little-Miss/dp/084317689X

*sigh* 

Xanga as we know and love it is gonna die (even if Xanga 2.0 comes online, it won't be the same).

Google Reader is gonna switch off.

The Bruins are beating the Pens and might go to the Stanley Cup finals...again.

I swear, if someone tells me my favourite restaurant is closing, I might have to throw myself off a bridge (not really, but I'm trying to be melodramatic here...so just humour me).

Source: http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-AqE-u7Kg0So/Tky987m9hnI/
AAAAAAAAEIc/Wee2eezVUHw/s1600/despair.jpg

I side with the dog. I don’t care what defence they put up. There is no excuse, ever, for that level of brutality. And the main reason I’m determined to judge him as per the letter of the law is because I don’t for even ONE second believe that his claim of mental illness is legitimate.

Crown Wants Vancouver Dog Killer To Spend Up To Six Months Behind Bars

By the time Whitlock decided to euthanize Captain, he was having trouble sleeping, acting erratically, and feeling paranoid.

“Bludgeon to death” – now the new definition of “euthanize”. Let’s look at the “old” definition.

Euthanasia http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/euthanasia
The act or practice of killing or permitting the death of hopelessly sick or injured individuals (as persons or domestic animals) in a relatively painless way for reasons of mercy

Do these injuries sound relatively painless?

• Lacerations to head and body
• Massive bruising to head and body
• Puncture wounds to the body

And apparently inflicted with a baseball bat. Because this kind of physical contact is “relatively painless”…you know…compared to being flayed.

His role in Captain’s death has also garnered so much media attention and public scrutiny that the stigma is enough to deter him from similar actions in the future.

Yeah…and following that logic, Paul Bernardo wouldn’t need to be locked up either. Because we all know for damned sure that Bernardo got WAY more media attention and was under greater public scrutiny. I’m sure the stigma of what he did would have deterred him too…NOT!

There’s no remorse.  There’s no understanding the gravity of his actions.  I don’t think it has anything to do with mental illness.  Because there are a million things he could’ve done differently…including telling the truth.

Whitlock told the police and psychiatrists that he believed Captain had been poisoned or cursed, and that he didn’t feel safe around the animal. As a result, he decided to “put him out of his misery.”

Really? So if *you* don’t feel safe, you should put the dog out of “its misery”?! WHEN WAS THE DOG MISERABLE!?

“I should have taken him to the vet, but felt it was my responsibility because he was my dog”

And how exactly is senselessly and inhumanely, bludgeoning a dog to death considered, “taking responsibility?” The vet would’ve given the dog 2 needles. But sure, I can see how that would be considered irresponsible…TO YOUR WALLET!

Captain wasn’t just some dog.  He was a former police dog.  Why was he retired from service?  BECAUSE HE WAS TOO FRIENDLY!!! TOO FRIENDLY!!! And for that, he was bludgeoned to death by someone who should never have been allowed to buy a dog…someone who didn’t have the personal strength to get over the breakdown of his parents’ marriage, separation from his wife and son, and substance abuse. You know what? Sad as these stressors are, they’re not exactly uncommon. And no, I won’t feel sorry for a dog murderer just because he’s an emotional weakling. Lots of people come from homes with failed marriages. My parents’ marriage is so dysfunctional, I think that divorce might help with my sanity. Being separated from his wife and son…I’m sorry, I don’t view that as a big deal cuz quite frankly, IT HAPPENS TO FREAKING EVERYONE! And substance abuse…if you self-medicate with alcohol/drugs/painkillers, don’t ask me to feel sorry for you.  There are tons of services available to help those struggling with depression/mental illness.  If you choose the route that is consistently advertised as inappropriate, then you can accept all the consequences of your choice.

I know I sound completely heartless. But I’m not. Dogs are the most loyal, loving animals ever. They love you EVEN WHEN YOU DON’T DESERVE IT! Humans are experts at killing animals and each other in complete acts of senselessness.  So if you think for one second that any of these weak attempts at defense are going to move me, you’re crazy.  I would never side with a violent “crazy” person (who isn’t even legitimately crazy) over a dog.  EVER.

Lock Brian Whitlock up and throw away the key.  Or…feed him to a pack of feral dogs.  I don’t care.  For those of you non-dog people, on the plus side, it’s a good thing it was Captain who ate “something off the ground during a walk”. If it was Whitlock’s son who suffered this fate, more of you would be outraged.

Relaunching Xanga: A Fundraiser

So Xanga is in a money crunch.  This sucks.  Though I can't say I'm very surprised.  It's just really hard to make money as a blog hoster.

As a general rule, I don't pay for web services.  Same goes for mobile apps.  I only use web services (blogging, photo hosting, etc...) or mobile apps that are free.  But Xanga, is one of the few things where I did pay.  I used to blog a lot.  I used to have a lot more to say.  Or maybe I just used to make more time to say what's on my mind by formulating a story and including references and pictures.  I'll admit that it was my transition to Twitter that led to my sudden, almost complete, blogging silence.  It's not that I don't like blogging.  I just got lazy.  It was faster to scream 140 characters (including spaces) into the void than to properly compose a compelling story.

And were it not for the sheer fluke of seeing coolmonkey's most recent blog at the top of my subscription screen, I might not even have realized that Xanga was in such dire straits.  And then when I read his blog post before that, I realized he'd already scooped me...cuz his rage was basically my reaction.

Anyways...I was one of those who paid $100 for a Lifetime membership (I don't even remember when I paid, but for sure it was way more than 4 years ago).  So I was wondering what would happen if Xanga achieves their fundraising target.  What would that mean for me?  It wasn't in the blog post where they announced the fundraiser, but sifting through the comments, I eventually found this.

"At various times over the past decade, we've sold Lifetime Premium memberships for $100. Because we normally charge $25 for a year-long Xanga Premium membership, this means that after 4 years of Xanga Premium service, your Xanga Premium has been free.

As mentioned above, the current Xanga Premium program is being shelved. But we will be offering credits in the new system for all Lifetime Premium members, at the rate of $25/year. If it's been a year since you bought a Lifetime Premium membership, we will give you a credit of $75. If it's been two years, you'll receive a credit of $50; three years = a credit of $25. If it's been more than four years, you won't receive a monetary credit but we will find another way to offer you something special as a thank you.

If the fundraiser is successful, then all Lifetime Premium credits can be used towards Xanga blogging memberships."

So...$25/year, eh?  Honestly...considering how much my blogging has dropped off, I couldn't possibly justify it.  It's not a lot of money.  I waste more money on my gym membership by not going enough.  But the fact that I pay a gym membership motivates me to go...or makes me feel guilty about not going.  A blogging fee would just annoy me...especially since I have so many other options for blogging that are free.  While I vastly prefer Xanga to Blogger (yes, I've also had one of those accounts for years), I wouldn't be willing to pay $25/year for it. 

My blog hosting site can't be a charity case.  While I understand the struggle, Xanga is a business.  And if the business model isn't sound, then the business will fail.  The charity part will just delay the inevitable.

While I hope that Xanga can find a way out of it, I can also see that their vision for the future isn't aligned with mine.  Considering how many other true charities their are out there, I simply cannot justify contributing money to a failing business that will implement a model of which I don't wish to parttake.  Especially since they saw the writing on the wall years ago and basically did diddly-squat about it.

Quite frankly, I would rather donate my money to saving polar bears.

Source: http://www.naturepl.com/pictures/dpb.jpg

Sometimes, people think that I exaggerate when I talk about my boss' ridiculousness.  But I swear to you with every fibre of my being, there is zero embellishment in my stories.  I give an unadulterated account of the unbiased truth.  I only pass judgement or give commentary after the truth has been laid out.

And so, I give you this morning's ridiculousness.

He will be out of the office until the end of next week.  Today, he's boarding an airplane for a conference.  From the airport, I get the following string of IM-like emails.

9:33 am Pointy-Haired Boss (PHB): Can u see if there are speaking notes for section A? If so, please print them and give them to the CFO.  You may wish to edit before giving him.  If there aren't any notes, ask Big C [the consultant] to draft some. The consultant was cc'd.

9:35 am Big C: There are notes, but I'd like to suggest a few edits, if that's ok. What's the best way to get them to you, cokeaddict?

So before I could even reply, my boss sends:

9:37 am PHB: cokeaddict will adivse.

Well, NO SHIT I would advise. Did he think I wasn't going to answer a question that she posed directly to me?

This may seem like a very small thing to rant about, but bear in my, EVERY MINUTE OF MY WORK DAY is as intellectually stunted as this.

EVERY

SINGLE

MINUTE

Source: http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-cYoev4LaAAE/UOXA66k6JfI/
AAAAAAAALo0/eONiGBhcG3g/s1600/headdesk.gif.gif