January 27, 2011

  • Disappointment

    Today has totally been one of those days.  I got some news in the middle of the day that distressed me.  So much for de-stressing at my yoga class.  At least the most trying part of it is over.

    I know that the world doesn’t revolve around me (all the time ) and I’m not the person in the forefront of everyone’s mind (all the time ) – but I honestly thought he would’ve at least told me before running off [Clarification point:  I am NOT referring to the Ex].

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    FYI
    source:
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    Maybe it’s not my right to get upset.  After all… it’s not like he’s obligated to tell me anything.  But even a simple FYI as a courtesy?  Would that have been too much to ask?  I didn’t realize that I was so unimportant that I would get nothing at all.  In fact, I only found out by accident because someone who knew what was happening felt that I should know.  And that person didn’t even tell me directly, even though he was fully in the know.  He just cryptically and discretely alluded to it so that I would know enough to inquire.  I haven’t inquired… yet.  I don’t know if I should.  Mostly because I don’t know if everything was just all in my own head.  Maybe it only matter to me.

    You know…you’d think after all these years, I’d be used to this by now.  But I’m not.  And it hurts.  And it still sucks, large.  I’m not depressed.  But I’m definitely disappointed.

    Disappointment Coupon
    source:  http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3197/3064088848_2a4b8faf48_b.jpg

    Disappointed that I wasn’t told.

    Disappointed that I thought I was important enough to be told.

    Disappointed that I cared.

    And disappointed in my reaction (why does this even matter?).

    Girls can be so damned emo. Even heartless ones like me.  Sometimes, I'm my own biggest disappointment.  Gawd, I need a drink.


    source:  http://sydfish.files.wordpress.com/2008/02/martini_time.jpg

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