July 4, 2012
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On nights when I take the trouble to look pretty
Maybe I just don't do this as often as I used to. I seem to have fewer of these stories these days. Anyways...I know you all love reading these, so let's just get on with it.
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I don't usually doll myself up. I especially do not usually wear a summery baby doll dress (if I do, it's under a suit jacket for work...and even then, I try to look corporate). And I most certainly do not do full eye make-up if I'm going to be roaming around in the heat all day long -- you know, for fear of the "sad panda" effect (translation: smudging).
But on this day, I did all of these things because there was a remote chance that I might get to meet one of my favourite actors of all time. Now, don't get excited. This isn't a stalker/groupie kind of thing. I just don't want him to see me looking like a train wreck. Plus, when I look pretty, I feel more confident and am less likely to make a fool of myself. I know everyone generally prefers the stories where I make a fool of myself, but I don't want to spoil people by giving them too much of what they want.
Anyways, I had purchased a single ticket to the Broadway performance. I didn't wrangle any friends/family to go with me, because quite honestly, I wanted this moment to myself. Plus, I don't like making others pay for a premium/high-priced seat if they don't love the actor/production as much as I do. And I wasn't about to get cheap ass seats. As it happens, three people came in and sat next to me...one single guy and a couple.
Now, this isn't Toronto. This is New York City. What do you think happens, when a guy (similar in age), sits down next to an unaccompanied, pretty girl in a theatre? Yup...he tried to chat me up between each act (there were 3 acts). I don't want to be mean so I'll leave out the exact details of the conversation, but safe to say, he wasn't the smoothest. He zoomed in on awkward subjects, like stereotypes about Canadians, South Park, and Mormons. Yeah...it wasn't pretty. But he definitely gets an A for effort. Just kept trying and never gave up.
Anyone who has seen me in action knows that I'm quite difficult when I'm not interested in conversing. I wasn't rude. In fact, quite the contrary, I was extremely cordial and friendly. However, I didn't do anything to sustain the conversation, and I was very closed and offered up minimal (if any) personal information that might encourage his attention.
After several awkward starts and stops to conversations, he blurted out an invitation to have drinks after the show. This does not normally happen when I'm cordially stonewalling a guy. He doesn't ASK for more conversation time. I was caught off guard and accidentally accepted. I hate it when that happens. But at least I had the entire 3rd act to think of a way out of it.
During the standing ovation, he leaned over and told me that if his party doesn't leave the theatre right away (which I interpreted as him saying they were going to check out the stage door), then he'd meet me at the front of the theatre. I said ok. Once the last curtain call was done, I immediately rushed into the crowd. He noticed that I had gone with the flow and called after me, so I gestured that I had to keep walking. That's when he did the unexpected. He broke from his companions to join the crush of bodies flowing out of the theatre to try to catch up with me.
DANGER DANGER!! IMMINENT DISASTER APPROACHING!!!
So I pushed through the crowd. I contemplated for a second going downstairs to the washroom, but then I'd be trapped with only one possible exit. So I continued to try to exit the theatre. When we poured out onto the street, I quickly walked (almost ran) across the street to blend in with the crowd coming out of another theatre. I could hear him calling my name so I weaved in an out of the crowd until I got to Times Square. There, without ever looking backwards, I briskly walked towards the metro station. I'm telling you, I've never been so grateful for such a massive crowd in my life. Once I got into the metro station, I knew I was safe.
Disaster averted.
To be honest, I'm not normally opposed to having a drink after the show because I don't mind forming new acquaintances. However, when he semi-leered and said that we could have a drink at his hotel which is "conveniently nearby", I resolved to retrack my commitment. Dude, I'm not that kind of girl.
You know...this would not have happened in Toronto. Everyone would have politely ignored each other's existence.
